Okayyyy

I've never wanted this so bad before. I don't even know why now. It doesn't make any sense, how I weigh things in my head, the good, the bad, and the ugly, when I am nowhere close to it. It cannot be because I want to run away from everything, I don't think that is a valid reason. I still have no clue what the right reason should be, but I just know that one will not be valid.

This is pathetic.

I guess it’s never too late to say my Thankyous :)

I am not such a fan of birthdays, or big events for that matter. But this year, the year I can be legally illegal, I have so many people to thank for the time they took out to send some birthday love.

To my earliest greeters Princess Moleta (for the love, sober or otherwise – “lobster” takes on a new meaning now. Haha!) Rachelle Lim (for being always, always available every time I need to drag people to the happy place that is Eastwood), Paolo Valdez (my favourite “character builder”), who all sent in their love a few minutes after the clock struck 12. You guys made my night. Thank you for getting un-jaded with me in the Spiderwick jump. Three cheers to you my all-time favourite betches! Thank you!

To the people who answered my pathetic YM stat message announcing, “soliciting birthday greetings” the first hour of my birthday and wished me a happy day: Miguel Juat, Kriselda Cabrera, and Princess Moleta again for replying to the stat message pa rin. Thank you!

To the people who took the time out to send sweet SMSs: April Agustin, Ayen Luna, Kat Mangubat, Uncle Eric, Jamie Santelices, Dianne Miranda, Mark Francisco, KC Reyes, Albie Flores (Sweeeeeet! You never forget! MY love goes out to youuuu!), Eds Serrano (for the love, you know I love you), Cho Gonzaga (who really made my day, gusto kong umiyak nalala mo ko, Cho!), Paolo Medina, Camille Soliven, Brian Almocera, Ging Sabido, Ate Emily and Uncle Jo, Dianne Miranda again (for greeting the second time, haha).

To the people who replied to my second pathetic YM stat, “soliciting birthday greetings, still” the night of the twentieth: Moses Alcid (who I had to remind about my birthday, but I forgive anyway cos the betch has this weird spell, he acts all stupid but I love him anyway), Gabb Agapito (aka Mahal, who I literally had to solicit the greeting from, but I forgive again, cos I love him immensely as well), Cuayo Juico (who gave me a “virtual” rose and assured me he is “doing everything in his power” to ensure we get a good feasib grade” *wink wink*), Cams Vidad (my forever favourite ES groupmate, makakabawi din tayo!), KC Agustin (for Superpoking me AND greeting me still over at YM because she says she doesn’t know which one I prefer. That was really sweet, thank you!), Danielle Escano (who I am still convinced is one of the sweetest girls around. We will get to see each other soon in a gig, I promise!), Trish Velez, Tet Grajo, and Kristel Leonardo. Thank you!

To the people who gave me the sparkly “virtual” greetings *oyeh, I am such virtual community junkie* over at Friendster: Ate Joy Andres, Ate Shiela, Adelaine Arias, and Mary Anne Gultia. Over at Multiply, thank you Bojy Domingo. And over at Facebook, Jennifer Ngo, Jessica Hermosa, Jerrick Parrone, Rachelle Lim (yes, I think the virtual cake will be better than the DQ one!), Kuya Jon Lim, and my lovely, lovely cousin, Danica Engua (my love goes out to you, thank you for making me feel really loved. Love you dude!).

To the people who justified the late greetings, Haha! My love still really goes out to you all, I am touched by the SMSs: Bernadette Cordero (it was definitely a pleasant surprise to receive birthday greetings from you!), Evanel Policarpio, Christine Soliman ( I really enjoyed our conversation from last Saturday. You are sorely missed, we should see each other very soon!), Lahainie Crisostomo (yes, we shall sleep over soon). And the Gia Luga greeting the day after. Thank you!

Also, to the people who sent in their birthday love through my Mother and through other people, thank you! Tita Teena (who I love to bits for the love she has for my Mum and for me, too), Mommy Lucy, Uncle Dennis, Kuya Tonton, Tita Tess Olaguer (who I found out celebrates her birthday ont he same day -- happy birthday, too!), and this little boy Daren who is a regular at the shop who I found out wants to send his birthday greetings, too! Thank you!

I am not very sure how my thankyous will get to all of you you,since I know only a handful of you visit this blog. But if by some lucky circumstance you chance upon this entry, please send some love and be heard! Send some love over at the chatterbox or post a comment.

Again, my love goes out to you all. You guys made me happy by remembering, Thankyouuuuu! :)

Tonight I sleep happy :)

Tonight's the first in a long time I had a Thank You thought bubble without the sarcasm. Tonight I mean it. Thank youuuuu! :)

To the people who made my night,thank you from the bottome of my newly un-jaded heart. You three are still my top betches :)

And to my circumstance, thank you that you are figuring yourself out. Thank you for the teeny weeny good things that are actually materializing. Let's keep it going, I could use more good news :) Heehee.

Okay, bedtime :)

*sings to the flowers* Aaaaaah ah ah ah aaaaaaah :P Good days ahead I can tell :)

*Insert sigh of relief here*

I think at the least I earned a sigh of relief :) Even after the Feasib, things still felt tight. And why wouldn't they, seven days before our event, all the betches of the badass rich corporations still havent made up their fickle minds. No Yes-es or No-s for us -- just Call Us Back Agains. And then came our Saturday, and then I was happy.

Deja Vu finally :) I'd just like to say my thank yous. Hello Mr. sponsor, Tand.uay, how can I forget? Mr. Will.iam A.ng, you really were the nicest. Thank you for being true to your Feb8 promise. Ooh, and I love the Cookies 'n Cream drink!

And to everyone AIESEC who came, much love to all of youuu! :) Of course, to the OC, just like in the group text, Dennischua, Marlowejavier, Jeromelu, Nikkilibrada, thankyouuuuu! and Phoebesebastian, thank you thank you! Yay to the OC :)

Saving the best for last, for my favorite betches :) It wouldn't be half as fun had you guys not made it! Three cheers to good times, acting drunk when sober, pretending to be sober when drunk, three tonnes of blue eye shadow, badass dancing :P, and um, sharing! And then am happy :)




I never thought "sharing" was such a value in this friendship :P He must be hot! And erm, sweaty. Good times, good times :)

Just When I Thought There Was No Going Farther Downhill

Today, I screwed my last and only chance to redeem myself in StratMan class. Last Friday's requisite sourgraping was for good reason. We were practically made the poster kids for What Not To Do On Your StratMan Report. As if I hadn't been damaged enough with the shitty report, today my academic life decided on a suicide. On the day I did not read the case, on the day I did not write the case, on the day I did not even get to touch our paper much more read it, I get called to panel. Someone who holds my stars must really love me, they keep my lucky stars safely stashed away -- there where I can never find it.

Shitty pop culture (which I consume in obcene amounts in the form of TV and B movies) tells you its always about the big things. In happiness, in diappointments, in practically everything else, everything is pretty much measured throught the big things -- family, friends, school, career. Disappointments mainly come from failure in these areas, only. What it doesn't tell you is that failure in little everyday nitty gritties can add up to one big shitty emotional mess. That the big things can be pretty okay (and this is not saying they are going alright) but things still don't feel right.

So many things going on, it just makes me go, "Whoah, life". I am trying gratitude here, but everything pretty much going all wrong in all possible ways just makes me unable to. Sometimes, all I ask for is a little respite. I wish, You give me the small things.

Bentang benta!

In the midst of my brain stuffed full (I never said it was all important stuff), group dynamics gone haywire, and the general hohum feeling I've been nursing for the longest time, The Morning Rush managed to crack me up. Fan love gets the better of me, I guess. I'm here in the BA lib finishing work for the Culminight, and of course, free nternet access always wins me over. Anyhoo, I was checking Chico's blog when I came across his Top Ten post. At the risk of looking like a total doofus because I am alone here in the library table, stifling laughter like a retard, I shall repost and share.

For the uninitiated, let me share about the Morning Rush. I call the Morning Rush my One Undying Devotion. Haha. It's a morning show at RX 93.1 hosted by Chico and Delle that runs from 6 to 9. It has a special segment called the Top Ten where the hosts announce a topic for the day and the listeners text in their answers. Chico (or Delle on Wednesdays) picks out 30 entries in all and announces them in fives every thirty minutes. You get the drill. This Top Ten's topic was: Dumbest Things You've Ever Heard Anyone Say. It's hands-down funny!

Funnier thing is, I've downloaded an audio version of this already, but reading it now still cracks me up! This is hilarious. So here's a ripoff of the Top Ten from Chico's blog:

• Dongster - While watching the news yesterday about a kid killed by a bulldozer, our maid commented: “Kaya ayoko mag-alaga ng aso eh…”
• Loipogi - Nadia Montenegro promoting her movie: “Please watch ‘The Life Story of Julie Vega’, opening na po on the twenty-twoth of November.”
• Frederique - In a burger joint I heard a man say: “Miss, isa ngang ‘amusing’ aloha at saka ‘kidney’ meal.” Server: “Dine in po ba or to go?” The man answered: “Ayoko ng sago!”
• Marissa - My friend said: “Ang galing ‘no, yung Ash Wednesday last year , Miyerkules din pumatak!”
• Dukeman - My aunt was going to the US for the 1st time. She told us: “Nagpapabili ang tita niyo ng ‘autistic’ guitar. Saan ba nakakabili nun?”
• No name - Barker ng bus: Ah Cubao, Cubao, Cubao, Cubao, Cubao, Cubao, Cubao, Cubao, Cubao, Cubao!!!” Pasahero: “Boss, Cubao?”
• Slowbyslow - I overheard a lady place an order at Starbucks: “One cup of chino please.”
• Ruby - My sister said of our neighbor who was our arch enemy: “Mamatay na sana kapitbahay natin!” I told her not to say that, coz it might bounce back to us. Then she said, “Ah ganun ba yun? In that case, mamatay na sana tayo!”
• Asht - I had a meeting with a friend and I noticed that both of us were wearing stripes. He suddenly blurted out: “Uy, stripes din! It’s the color of the day!”
• Jonalou22 - From the gameshow “The Weakest Link”. Host Edu Manzano asked: “Anong ‘T’ ang ibinibigay ng konduktor pag nagbayad ka ng pamasahe sa bus?” Ian Veneracion answered: “TUKLI!”

In your face incoherence

I am just so overwhelmed with everything. I have marketing to do and it's not helping that that for the most part, the answers I get are mostly NO. I am still hungover with feasib, and that's something I pretty much cannot do anything about.

Okay, let's use kidspeak and let's make my life easier. I am sad. I don't know what will make me happy(er) and I am thinking that's the harder part. I can't possibly keep on going out because after some time, THE Friends will get tired of the Whiny Kid, and resources will run out. I cant keep forcing people to throw out money at eating places that make us pay outrageous service charge, just because I feelbad and I need company. But on second thought, maybe my friends are spineless people and I can bully them some more :P Oh, I love my friends! (That was the first statement of my life that is not , laced with any trace of sarcasm. I am proud). Thank heavens for friends who won't admit they love you, but go out of their way to show you :)

Three cheers for you my lovely, spineless bitches! I am fighting the urge to actually say I Love You, because I know I shall never be forgiven for this one little slip. Heehee. That felt better :)

But still. In true Whiny Kid fashion -- Gah, this sucks. I hate it when I'm stuck in a rut I have no idea how to get out of (which is almost all the time). Thanks to THE friends, but my battle cry still is -- So much to do, so little resolve to start working.