Friday, February 02, 2007

job titles

i just came from an hour and a half long HR exam. my head's still turning from the reading marathon i've been on since this weekend. Lord, have mercy and puhleaaase am hoping to see a happy face on me when i see the exam :P *coughpwedefivemistakeslangcough?*

in the midst of exam week, and in the name of good friendship, i let the breakup (not mine) share brainspace. i have been meddling -- sorreh. but you know me, it's all in the name of rationality, and well, care and concern, and love, and friendship and.. get it? i don't even know if i did what was supposed to be done. well, now he's nuts and sad and battling with looong bouts of the D.

i've been such a sucker for rationality for quite a long time that i think i kinda forgot how it is to know what's right and stil act silly. life for me has somehow become black and white. i feel like i have lost all appetite for living life on the edge, daring myself to try the unknown, plunging head on into things without thinking. gahd, i feel like am forty! but yeah, am too preoccupied about being rational i forgot that life's supposed to be fun. don't feel sorry for me, am fine thank you. rational can be happy, too. :)

so should i feel guilty? sometimes it sucks to be the *get ready for this* best friend. i know in my heart it's all about concern and wanting this one to be better (well especially for this one who after roughly a year has still not gotten over Homesickness) i think i feel for him and what he's been through. just forgive when sometimes i morph into your mommy -- well, like now.

i prolly thought i understood you -- now i don't think i do.
i was prolly too harsh on you. i prolly forgot you had feelings too, and that you can think for your self.
i know how well you did back when it was my turn to flood you with my trash.
sorry for not being the listener that you needed -- and more apologies for mega meddling
and giving you pleenty of unsolicited how-tos. sorrry. 

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