Tuesday, March 31, 2009

No judgment allowed

Kid is secretly infatuated with a Facebook dude. Super smart, articulate, in control (just had to add this, but I don't really know if he is :P), and living in the moment (this I also know nothing of, but it kinda sounds sexy to be able to describe someone as that). Must I state again, virtual crush so I know um, virtually nothing about him. This got me thinking, virtual crushes like this are scarily treading the thin line between funny stalking to sleazy internet obsessions. Since this still is the first time am talking about him, I think it would still be safe to say, this is funny. Maybe a good ten entries away from becoming sleazy. So yeah, green and go on the gushing.

Facebook dude is a darling. When I said smart, I meant
magna cum laude smart from this college (in UP no less) that shall remain unnamed. I figured that the 08 batch from their college had like less than 5 magnas, and he was one of the what, 2 boys. So no, I have decided to not name this college. Hint, people from aforementioned college like to create um, plans. Don't ask me why I know these things.

In my defense, the social web says we only are one degree apart, which means I need only this one person that links us to I don't know, introduce us. The introduction never happened, unfotunately, so yeah, we really don't know each other. Or to be more blunt, he doesn't know me. But Facebook has been helpful, and if it weren't exactly freaky, I'd probably say that I know him quite a bit. Throwing freaky internet-ing aside, I may actually have heard stories about him from this circle let's call the um, the interface.

I may have actually seen him in person. I remember having this thing for a GE class in Aldaba Hall. We had to watch a play for the SEA30 class in this really small theater. Outside the theater was a cocktail area, and right by the table was this interesting dude, who oddly looked familiar. I thought he was cute and he looked smart -- I don't know how I gauge that but for some reason he was sending out that vibe. A few shy glances and some outright ogling after, I figured he was brother to this other really smart boy from um, the interface. And then I realized he was that boy they were talking about -- the one who was outrageously smart, got a an
uno in Calculus, and that one I missed him by a full sem.

Dude's somewhere in Asia doing what he does best. He's living away from home, and more importantly living The Life and kicking butt. The only person I've recounted this story to was Neng. And yes, no judgment :P

EDIT: In my defense um,
again, (and I'd still like to think two disclaimers after, this still isn't being defensive :P) Facebook dude got the honor of being called Facebook dude because this sidebar in well, Facebook says he is someone and I quote, "I might know". Never had the balls to click "add friend". Well, for one it's just outright freaky and, two -- I think it being outright freaky is enough reason. So eyah, excuse me while I go back to my online gushing.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Oh, my phone apparently has Bluetooth

I’ve had my trusty 2600 for almost a year now. It can text, it can call – It’s fine, thank you. But it also has a camera with an unbelievably clear resolution for its type. I’ve never had a camera phone. I had a phone AND a camera pre-2600, and for me that was good enough. So I never got used to taking photos with my phone.

The 2600 I would say is today’s 3210. With a camera. I’ve never been one to get swayed by the phone hype, so no techie adventures for me and my phones. My problem with the 2600 was that it had a camera but didn’t come with a cord connector. I have a few photos taken with my phone for when I forget my camera and I had no idea how to move my pictures out of the celphone

Enter day of enlightenment. After roughly a year of being together, I just discovered last week that my phone had Bluetooth. Which means, I can move my photos to my laptop wireless-ly, and that I should take more pictures using my phone now.

Say hello to a blog entry courtesy of the discovery of my phone’s amazing features! I said the resolution was “unbelievably clear for its type” but the pictures a bit grainy. I just meant clearer than say, I don’t really know phone models, some entry level phone with a camera. Let’s use relativity here. Heehee. Some photos from my phone that found its way finally to my laptop.

Chinatown Kiddie Heaven

One of the schools we visited for my part-time hosting job was this pre-school in Binondo. I have never seen this many cute, cuddly, squishy Chinese babies! I was in heaven! I just wanted to grab them all and squish their pudgy arms and hug them so hard til they cry. Haha! This is a picture of my favourite boy, Baby J. He’s not a yet student cause he’s all of a year old and ten months, he’s baby brother of one of the kids and his yaya was kind enough to let me take photos of this adorable kid. I even got a wet kiss on the cheek :) Baby J’s photos has turned many of bad days to bearable days. How can those cheeks not make your day?

H&E Dinner

I originally didn’t want to go. It was a Friday night, so as usual I had a duffel bag and my change of clothes which consisted of a regular round neck shirt, jeans, and ratty slippers – I call it the UP look. We were really supposed to have dinner that Friday night but Friendcess cancelled last minute so I considered bailing, too. I thought maybe I better be at Mahal’s. But somehow, PV found a way to convince Friendcess to get off work early so dinner was pushing through. When PV texted me, I was halfway to the gym already and if I need to say it again, my change of clothes was the regular school day look. I texted back and said something with slippers. After a few exchanges, I got a text back with the words, “it’s you not your flashy clothes we want to have dinner with”, and I just figured people who say things like that should not be disappointed :) I’m happy I went. Good times, good times.

If only for dinners like this, I’d be back in college in a heartbeat. Miss you guys!

Ooh, one more thing, although Rach denies it, she may have sent me a message with the words and I quote, “katz i miss u”. For one she used ‘z’ for my name, and for another, she just said I miss you. Haha! Don’t worry Rach, even without the Raf message, I miss you, too! I hope that wasn’t too icky. Haha!

Hello back High School

Left to right: Twenty thousand calories in a neatly-packed coffee cup; Me, Rap and Sweet at Starbucks; Genuine concern shown through a yummy drink. Labyu Sweet!

I went back to Mahal’s last Saturday. Incidentally, there were almost 10 of us from high school that night, so it was a happy meeting of sorts. It’s just sad that we have to meet at a wake. I guess the meeting was long overdue because stifled giggles were aplenty, and well inappropriate. Some people we saw Saturday were Sheena, Ging, Ming and Max, Cathy, Aiza, Popo, Rap, Sweet, Dabs, Pao, Thomas, and the ever-present Cho.

We ended up bringing Sweet home. Thanks Rap for acting all BG aka Body Guard and Mark for coming over, and well pretending like he came earlier than he actually did. Hehe. Overpriced gourmet coffee and 2 really large bags of chips shared under the shy moonlight, car trunks and 2 wooden benches make for a good time for catching up.

Thank you Sweet for being pretty much the same person I knew from 5 years ago. More than the free coffee, thank you for still knowing me, and being able to read the look on my face. I am amazed at how you managed to ask me if I was okay when everyone else doesn’t see the difference, or maybe does see it but choose to not pay attention. Knowing you care makes my sadness go away a little. Thank you!

Thursday, March 12, 2009

How to (Not) Jumpstart your Monday

I am writing the Monday evening story roughly 2 full weeks after it has happened. Fourteen days, two blow by blow accounts over the phone, about twenty random short stories about the incident, and a hundred scene by scene instant replays after -- this is my processed version of the fateful Monday night hoopla. Okay blow by blow account starts now.

It was a beautiful Monday and I’ve been psyched since the week before about the 2-hour marathon class Monday night. So came 630 and there I was, signing up at the reg booth, getting a free banana, a bottle of vitamin water in color blue, and a pink celphone thingum. I went inside the room and there must have been over a hundred people in the roughly hundred-square meter room. I loved it, I loved the fact that I was there, I loved it that there were all these people who came all the way from wherever to be part of the marathon class, and I loved it that it promises to be a really fun experience. The energy in the room was amazing you can touch it. People were hooting, obviously excited to sweat it out in the next two hours.

The music started playing and everyone was bursting with unbelievable energy. The room was so cramped; my distance from the next person was about less than a ruler’s length. I feel a swish of air on my cheeks every time the guy behind me does air kicks. The room was bursting to seams, and I loved it. The energy was intoxicating, I loved the high. I was having a grand time. Until.

About an hour and a half into the class, a mean thought popped into my head. I remembered this time when I was just about a few months into Combat. I thought I was good, err not really, but at the least better than the awkward newbies who throw weird side kicks. I still am awkward myself, but then again, good and better are always relative. I was at the backmost row and in the row in front of me was a girl in a jacket who was flailing around and looked really tired only a few minutes into the class. A few moments later, she did either a front kick or a side kick, and then next thing I knew she was plopped on the floor. On her butt. And the proud and arrogant me stifled a mean smile. But inside my head, I was laughing like a maniac.

Then I snapped out of the thought. A few moments later, I jumped and just before I landed, it felt like things were on freeze frame, as if someone was play-pause-ing my fall. Just before I hit the ground, my left foot twisted and I landed on the side of my foot. I lost all balance and my right foot wasn’t able to save me. Suddenly, the mean thought flashed back and I just realized that I was going to be ‘that’ girl tonight. After what seemed like a good full minute, I was on the floor. On my butt. And oh, I was wearing a bright red shirt. My adrenaline rush had me jumping back on my feet in 3 seconds flat. Went on to finish the last minute or so of the song.

And the big question was – finish the last 30minutes of the class and pretend like no accident of the falling sort happened OR go out and attempt to save face? I had a grand total of 7 seconds to decide while drinking my blue vitamin water in between songs. Going on with the class like nothing happened is just weird. But going out right after falling is just plain loser. So after giving it ‘much’ thought, I stayed. I was feeling pangs of pain on my left foot but since I don’t have any friends to maybe assist me out of the class or laugh about it with, I went on to finish the last 5 tracks of the marathon class. But no jumping. After what seemed like forever, the class ended.

Before the event, it was announced that there was going to be a raffle at the end, more importantly awards for best combat students. Try as I may not to pine for it, I was really hoping I land a spot in the roster of the best for the night. But then hour and a half into it, the infamous fall happened so I just dropped pining to get awarded altogether. I thought to myself, getting a prize would be a pity thing at worst and appreciated considerable talent but with some pity at best. I didn’t want that. I seriously thought I had good form, and I that I have improved markedly since the day I started. But then again, best is relative.

I limped my way out of the class immediately after. I was starting to feel the pain on my left foot, maybe because the adrenaline rush was slowly waning. I headed to the drinking fountain thinking about the possibility of winning. I felt like I at least had a good fighting chance. I couldn’t resist it so I ended up peeking through the glass door; you know just to see who won. I was standing right outside when a girl approached me to ask if I was the girl in the third row. My immediate response was, “The one that fell?” and I have never felt more of a loser than that instance. The girl just shook her head and said she doesn’t remember. She then ushered me in and told me I won something. And just as I had hoped, finalist for best combat student caps the night. They had an argument whether my shirt was red or fuchsia and then finally settled for red. I was led to the stage, handed a teddy bear (which was really cute btw, and that’s something since I’m not a fan of stuffed toys), given GC’s, and then photographed with the instructors. The whole time my head had the word “pity” and a really large question mark to go with it. I knew I had a good chance of landing a spot but I still seriously doubt whether the fall had anything to do with the winning. Who would’ve thought.

I had to call PV and Friendcess to recount the whole thing before I took my bath. I was limping and shaking during the two conversations. And I quote Friendcess, “I can feel your embarrassment from the gym to my house”. And PV being the super supportive friend that he is sent a text after the conversation and I quote, “OMG. I have thought very hard about what happened and I cannot think of anything you can actively do to go past your social blunder. I guess what you can do is let it pass until people don’t think about it AS MUCH.” It was baaaad.

And that was the story of that fateful Monday night. My only consolation was that R still wasn’t there when the falling on the butt happened. Incidentally, he came about a good 5 minutes after I got back on my feet. Falling was bad enough. If R had seen me, I would’ve died right on.

My ankle was swollen for a good two weeks. I had it bandaged the day after the fall. I don’t know if it helped but it made me feel like an injured athlete in a good way. Heehee. I had to have it removed though, because I got a lot of flak from the boys of the hosting gig, and I was told, no I take that back, I was scolded because they said the bandage doesn’t do the foot any good. So there goes my ruined attempt at looking athlete-y.

More than the swollen foot, I feel really bad for looking weak and not in control of my body. And do I even need to say it, social stigma sucks bigtime. Ohwell. But everyone’s been kind enough to turn a blind eye on the whole thing. I haven’t really seen anyone pointing at me and then laughing, so I guess I’m fine. But really, the next time I went to gym after the incident. I was shaking just right before I went through the door. I don’t know, maybe I have come to expect the worst of people and that I was preparing myself for when in case someone decides to laugh at my face while recounting the falling. Hehe, I really overthink things like that. Oddly, two weeks after and it feels so long ago. I just thought it would haunt me longer. I may be more grownup than I think. Haha!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Stories from the (Delayed) Gap Months

Okay, so life review.We're closing in on the second month of the Gap Months Delayed Edition (supposedly the months following college grad before you land a real world job, which I forewent, because I, uh, made some decisions that were um, different. So a short stint in the real world and I'm back home, doing my um, Gap Months). So here's what's been up:

Kid got lucky :) Month 2, Day 1 of the Delayed Gap Months, I read a post from Multiply about Guads' company trying to create a pool of hosts. So I was like, what the heck, I can speak decent English, can talk in front of people without breaking down (Hehe), and I really could use the fee so I don't have to go back to asking money from my parents. I sent Guads an SMS and told her I was interested. It was a non-commital text, sort of like throwing it out that I might be a possible option for the job. That time, I was on my last 2 minutes of internet time cause I was really on my way out of the house. I was surprised to get a reply from her asking me if she can call me. As it turned out, the need for hosts was really urgent -- like it's already tomorrow kind of urgent. I saw the post Monday afternoon, talked to Guads on the phone Monday early evening, and then 5minutes later whoah, I'm sort of employed.

I haven't even thought about whether I want to actually take the job, but Guads didn't even ask me if I wanted to take it. She went on to tell me over the phone about what I had to do and then Bam! 30 minutes later she was right outside the gym with the script in hand. Haha! I guess my saying yes was both a curiosity on my part as to whether I can actually do it and my wanting to save the day for them. Apparently, had I not said yes, the lady owner will take over the hosting gig -- like that serious a need. Heehee, I'm a secret superhero,
at least in my head. Super kid saves the day :P

It's been on for 2 weeks and I've been to roughly 20 schools playing host to Mommies and kids -- and on some days pretend-dentist in crowds of over a hundred wide-eyed kids. The first few times were nerve-wracking. I walk up to a few square meters of space that would be my pretend podium for the next thirty minutes and try to look like I know what I am doing. Then the crew and I jump from school to school trying to replicate the lively show from 2 hours ago. It was really taxing the first few times, add to that the fact that I got thrown into a group of people I barely know. And they're pretty um, open about things I'm not really comfortable talking about -- TMI overload. Hint, they're a bunch of boys who are waaay past puberty but still talk like 11-year olds who learned of Playboy only yesterday.

You know how there's an imaginary fence you put around yourself when you're with people you just met. Inside the fence is your little comfort cloud. If the new people try to walk past the fence you drive them out by, I don't know, saying something weird or making a funny face that says, "Whoah! Stepping on the the Line!" and then it's kind of like an understood signal to backoff. And regular people know they have to back off because it's the polite thing to do. But here, nobody does that. They step over your fence, and despite all the weird things I have said and the many funny faces I have tried to make, they just keep walking inside your comfort cloud as if it had a welcome sign and a friendly receptionist waving at them. It sucks. and I suck at trying to look okay around people like them, um fence jumpers, err imaginary fence tresspassers or something. Ooh, and one of them called me Baby on the second day of work. I said "called" because these days, its Baby Love. I mean, really?

But yeah, even with all that whiny-ness, I'd still say the hosting gig's worth it. For one, I get to spend for myself from the fee -- I get to stash a little for savings and give myself allowance. Not bad considering I don't have to work all days of the week. For another, I get to see really adorable kids all the time :) For one of the gigs, I don my white doctor's gown and introduce myself as a dentist. And then the kids give you
that look -- I can't really explain it, but it feels nice to be given that look. It's as if they like you already. And you should see the way they answer in chorus everytime you ask them something. I get a roaring choruses of little voices saying "yeeeeeeesss," "opoooooooo," "Okaaaaaayyyy poooooooo" I mean how can that not make your day? :) On some days, some little boys act like little versions of movie goons, trying to appear like the show is beyond them. You know, giving out funny answers to questions and saying stuff. But all in all, it's great experience. I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

On other things, still no word from any of the big real world companies I sent many nicely-written letters to. But this time I'll wait it out, I won't succumb to unreal pressure, and I'll make sure I will think things very many times before I give out a yes. Or a no. My predicted emotional breakdown is not gonna come :) I think? Thanks to my little kids who saved meeeee.

Still on other things, I still am mustering courage and clarity of mind to recount
that incident Monday evening in the gym. Meanwhile, I nurse my swollen left foot and plaster a hundred more Salonpas strips. I shall give a blow by blow account in a while. Excuse me while I douse my heavily bruised ego with Betadine.
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