Ponderings of the Pensive Kid in the Office

Grawrsh. Lazed butt on the run -- erm no, on the couch? My butt’s so lazy I can’t start to do anything. I am dizzy, the kind of dizzy you get when you’re sleepy, and I can’t seem to start writing or start pretty much anything. Oddly though, when I start viewing websites which are unrelated to work, or start writing things that make no observable value-added to the things I am supposed to be writing, the dizziness shakes off.

The things Mark Twain teaches us – if you remember the English classes well, you know his wise words about the difference between work and play. And I quote from the The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, “Work consists of whatever a body is obliged to do. Play consists of whatever a body is not obliged to do”. Classic example – reading the BBC. Back in second year college, willing myself to read the BBC to matterload is such a horrendously difficult task. Well for one the bloody English write differently, and two, the reading is required to become a well-versed, well-rounded average reasonable person aka debater. But look at how the tables are turned today observing dear Mr. Twain’s adage. Today I read the BBC for pleasure. I have an RSS feed on my browser and BBC articles are one drop-down menu and one click away. Reading the BBC is fun – but really, it is only fun because I am supposed to be reading PEZA articles and the latest BOI tables. Oh and screw that, of course I can’t forget FDI for the following verticals: medical transcription, finance back office, and engineering process outsourcing. I’ve read so much about them I can recite the top verticals even in my sleep.

Some thoughts from the working kid

27 days before graduation, I fortunately land myself a job. Nothing I would call glamorous or dreamy, but pretty decent for a first job. I am currently with Headway Business Services being what I call, a dirty little research analyst. I never thought in my life I'd be a researcher. It's just so um, "un-me". For one, it's a very antisocial job, bent over all day in the computer clicking through BOI, PEZA, you get the picture. I would say talking's not such a necessity in this job -- and for that, I think that says a lot about this job being "un-me".

But because I put my @internship on top of my priority list, job hunting for the "real" first job, a job that would translate to something that is based here in the Philippines, will have to take a back seat. My current job may not be "the" job, but I am really happy they took me in even if I will be staying for a mere three months.

Yesterday marked my fourth day at the office. The pressure of the Learning Curve is killing me. I think I am pretty much getting the hang of the job, but I still have this awkward feeling that I am lost. But yeah on the whole, doing pretty good so far.

Interesting story from yesterday, I had to be there at Ken's farewell party. (Not exactly HAD to be there, but more like bullied into being there -- being the Spineless New Employee that I am :P) Ken's an Indonesian kid from work who, I learned from yesterday, apparently comes from some prominent Indonesian clan. The kid's chauffeured to work in the mornings and fetched, I think that says a lot. So with all my four days-worth of "camaraderie" and whatever (nonexistent) friendships I might have made the days preceding that, I had to "party" with people from the office. They were all really nice and kind and interesting, and I mean that in the sincerest way possible. I even gave my word yesterday to Mike (the company top dog), that for the record, I had a great time. (Maybe I did, erm subconsciously? Heehee) For the most part, I was an incoherent, awkward blob. But that's just me. I sincerely believe, people in the office tried their best, and I think special mention goes to Mike, to make me feel part of this thing. And I guess for that my word about having a great time holds true.

I have a few more thoughts about Headway and the interesting dynamics in the office. Will write again soon :)

Just a little something something

Watchit! Watchit!

Monkey with a mirror. See what happens :P


Scary Monkey - More free videos are here

Quote Unquote

I am *wait for it* a closet sap. Okay with that out of the way, I don't think disclaimers will be necessary :P

I am sucha sucker for winner one-liners from movies, TV shows and whatever else that has dialogues. Everytime I watch things on my laptop (no, not porn :P), I pause-and-play like crazy becasue I have to open this notepad and write the lines when they come up.

Because classes were suspended today (ohwell, the jeepney drivers thought a power trip was good for today and stopped jeepney operations, leaving 80% of commuters stranded all over Manila -- but I digress), mornings are for blogging. Some of the dialogues are funny, some are heartwarming, some stupid, some are witty. And because sharing is good, dig in:

>> This one I read from an article in The Philippine Star by Joanne Rae Ramirez. Quoting Mark Twain:

"Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed with the things that you did not do than by the things you did do. So throw off the bowliness and sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

>> Because I am a hormonal girl/lady/woman/female, it is rational I love Grey's Anatomy :P The next ones I quote from Meredith Grey:

"Denial, it's not just a river in Egypt. Itsa freakin ocean"

"As surgeons, we live in a world of worst case scenarios. We cut ourselves off from hoping for the best -- cos too many times, the best doesn't happen."

>> Sick and twisted is how I describe Juno, the Ellen Page starrer about a 16-year old pregnant girl and her adoption issues. I lovelove that movie because it is commercial but amazingly gives off this indie feel to it. It's eccentric and weird but in an an adorable way. Th Juno and Bleeker lines.

talking to her dad about th pregnancy and hinting on a relationship with Bleeker:

Juno: "I just need to know that two people can stay happy and together forever."

(and this one from Bleeker really cracked me up :P)

Paulie Bleeker: "I feel the same about you. Can we make out now? :P"

Paulie Bleeker on why Juno got pregnant:
And Blair Witch Project was about to come on Starz, and you were like, "I haven't seen this in forever" and you wanted to watch it, but then you were like "Oh no, we should just make out instead. La la la."

Juno on Bleeker:
"As far as boyfriends go, Paulie Bleeker is totally boss. He is the cheese to my macaroni."

>> I caught the How I Met Your Mother hype pretty late. Other than Ted Mosby being that really nice guy I think about before I sleep, I love the show becuse the lines are funny, stupid, and heartwarming at the same time.

Marshall Ericsen to Lily after a fight about the eccentricities of their families:

"We'll be our own family. We'll find ways to freak out the prople our kids bring home."

Ted to Scherbatski before returning the blue french horn back to the bistro:

"I would've stolen you a whole orchestra :("

Ted after the Ted-Robin Breakup:

"I think for the most part, if you're really honest with yourself about what you want out of life, life gives it to you."

:)

e-babling v 2.0

I came from the RBI so am dead beat like anything. And then came this this from Trish's multiply. Tired means shitty online quizzes are forgivable. Barnum Effect notwithstanding, this thing's pretty creepy :P

And I quote the explanation for this (time-consuming shxt):
A wise man once said, "I drink, therefore I am!" An interesting comment indeed, but what does it mean? Well we think we have the answer. Every personality contains a lot of traits. This test aims to determine, from your name alone, the most dominant personality traits and give you a fun little recipe for your own personality cocktail.

How to make a katc

Ingredients: 1 part jealousy 1 part self-sufficiency 1 part leadership

Method: Add to a cocktail shaker and mix vigorously. Add a little cocktail umbrella and a dash of wisdom

Username:

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

Hmm, or maybe this thing's bogus. I changed the casing of the K and the C -- see how different the results came out :P

How to make a KatC

Ingredients: 3 parts pride 3 parts silliness 3 parts empathy

Method: Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Add a little curiosity if desired!

Username:

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

Oh well, that's 7 minutes of precious time -- now all gone :P

Anyhoo, since this is babbling alright, can I just say I'v been spending all my waking hours watching How I Met Your Mother. *Shhh* I finished the two seasons in less than a week. I am in love with the show :) Thanks Rach for the kind heart (and um, for being okay with piracy :P), and I really am crossing my fingers the writers quit their strike and keep writing :) Three cheers to Ted, Robin Scherbatski (am just too happy I can spell her last name :P), Bar *wait for it* ney, Lily and Marshall.

I can't believe half the time, they are toting beer bottles or if not are having sex, and am fine with it :P

Okayyyy

I've never wanted this so bad before. I don't even know why now. It doesn't make any sense, how I weigh things in my head, the good, the bad, and the ugly, when I am nowhere close to it. It cannot be because I want to run away from everything, I don't think that is a valid reason. I still have no clue what the right reason should be, but I just know that one will not be valid.

This is pathetic.

I guess it’s never too late to say my Thankyous :)

I am not such a fan of birthdays, or big events for that matter. But this year, the year I can be legally illegal, I have so many people to thank for the time they took out to send some birthday love.

To my earliest greeters Princess Moleta (for the love, sober or otherwise – “lobster” takes on a new meaning now. Haha!) Rachelle Lim (for being always, always available every time I need to drag people to the happy place that is Eastwood), Paolo Valdez (my favourite “character builder”), who all sent in their love a few minutes after the clock struck 12. You guys made my night. Thank you for getting un-jaded with me in the Spiderwick jump. Three cheers to you my all-time favourite betches! Thank you!

To the people who answered my pathetic YM stat message announcing, “soliciting birthday greetings” the first hour of my birthday and wished me a happy day: Miguel Juat, Kriselda Cabrera, and Princess Moleta again for replying to the stat message pa rin. Thank you!

To the people who took the time out to send sweet SMSs: April Agustin, Ayen Luna, Kat Mangubat, Uncle Eric, Jamie Santelices, Dianne Miranda, Mark Francisco, KC Reyes, Albie Flores (Sweeeeeet! You never forget! MY love goes out to youuuu!), Eds Serrano (for the love, you know I love you), Cho Gonzaga (who really made my day, gusto kong umiyak nalala mo ko, Cho!), Paolo Medina, Camille Soliven, Brian Almocera, Ging Sabido, Ate Emily and Uncle Jo, Dianne Miranda again (for greeting the second time, haha).

To the people who replied to my second pathetic YM stat, “soliciting birthday greetings, still” the night of the twentieth: Moses Alcid (who I had to remind about my birthday, but I forgive anyway cos the betch has this weird spell, he acts all stupid but I love him anyway), Gabb Agapito (aka Mahal, who I literally had to solicit the greeting from, but I forgive again, cos I love him immensely as well), Cuayo Juico (who gave me a “virtual” rose and assured me he is “doing everything in his power” to ensure we get a good feasib grade” *wink wink*), Cams Vidad (my forever favourite ES groupmate, makakabawi din tayo!), KC Agustin (for Superpoking me AND greeting me still over at YM because she says she doesn’t know which one I prefer. That was really sweet, thank you!), Danielle Escano (who I am still convinced is one of the sweetest girls around. We will get to see each other soon in a gig, I promise!), Trish Velez, Tet Grajo, and Kristel Leonardo. Thank you!

To the people who gave me the sparkly “virtual” greetings *oyeh, I am such virtual community junkie* over at Friendster: Ate Joy Andres, Ate Shiela, Adelaine Arias, and Mary Anne Gultia. Over at Multiply, thank you Bojy Domingo. And over at Facebook, Jennifer Ngo, Jessica Hermosa, Jerrick Parrone, Rachelle Lim (yes, I think the virtual cake will be better than the DQ one!), Kuya Jon Lim, and my lovely, lovely cousin, Danica Engua (my love goes out to you, thank you for making me feel really loved. Love you dude!).

To the people who justified the late greetings, Haha! My love still really goes out to you all, I am touched by the SMSs: Bernadette Cordero (it was definitely a pleasant surprise to receive birthday greetings from you!), Evanel Policarpio, Christine Soliman ( I really enjoyed our conversation from last Saturday. You are sorely missed, we should see each other very soon!), Lahainie Crisostomo (yes, we shall sleep over soon). And the Gia Luga greeting the day after. Thank you!

Also, to the people who sent in their birthday love through my Mother and through other people, thank you! Tita Teena (who I love to bits for the love she has for my Mum and for me, too), Mommy Lucy, Uncle Dennis, Kuya Tonton, Tita Tess Olaguer (who I found out celebrates her birthday ont he same day -- happy birthday, too!), and this little boy Daren who is a regular at the shop who I found out wants to send his birthday greetings, too! Thank you!

I am not very sure how my thankyous will get to all of you you,since I know only a handful of you visit this blog. But if by some lucky circumstance you chance upon this entry, please send some love and be heard! Send some love over at the chatterbox or post a comment.

Again, my love goes out to you all. You guys made me happy by remembering, Thankyouuuuu! :)

Tonight I sleep happy :)

Tonight's the first in a long time I had a Thank You thought bubble without the sarcasm. Tonight I mean it. Thank youuuuu! :)

To the people who made my night,thank you from the bottome of my newly un-jaded heart. You three are still my top betches :)

And to my circumstance, thank you that you are figuring yourself out. Thank you for the teeny weeny good things that are actually materializing. Let's keep it going, I could use more good news :) Heehee.

Okay, bedtime :)

*sings to the flowers* Aaaaaah ah ah ah aaaaaaah :P Good days ahead I can tell :)

*Insert sigh of relief here*

I think at the least I earned a sigh of relief :) Even after the Feasib, things still felt tight. And why wouldn't they, seven days before our event, all the betches of the badass rich corporations still havent made up their fickle minds. No Yes-es or No-s for us -- just Call Us Back Agains. And then came our Saturday, and then I was happy.

Deja Vu finally :) I'd just like to say my thank yous. Hello Mr. sponsor, Tand.uay, how can I forget? Mr. Will.iam A.ng, you really were the nicest. Thank you for being true to your Feb8 promise. Ooh, and I love the Cookies 'n Cream drink!

And to everyone AIESEC who came, much love to all of youuu! :) Of course, to the OC, just like in the group text, Dennischua, Marlowejavier, Jeromelu, Nikkilibrada, thankyouuuuu! and Phoebesebastian, thank you thank you! Yay to the OC :)

Saving the best for last, for my favorite betches :) It wouldn't be half as fun had you guys not made it! Three cheers to good times, acting drunk when sober, pretending to be sober when drunk, three tonnes of blue eye shadow, badass dancing :P, and um, sharing! And then am happy :)




I never thought "sharing" was such a value in this friendship :P He must be hot! And erm, sweaty. Good times, good times :)

Just When I Thought There Was No Going Farther Downhill

Today, I screwed my last and only chance to redeem myself in StratMan class. Last Friday's requisite sourgraping was for good reason. We were practically made the poster kids for What Not To Do On Your StratMan Report. As if I hadn't been damaged enough with the shitty report, today my academic life decided on a suicide. On the day I did not read the case, on the day I did not write the case, on the day I did not even get to touch our paper much more read it, I get called to panel. Someone who holds my stars must really love me, they keep my lucky stars safely stashed away -- there where I can never find it.

Shitty pop culture (which I consume in obcene amounts in the form of TV and B movies) tells you its always about the big things. In happiness, in diappointments, in practically everything else, everything is pretty much measured throught the big things -- family, friends, school, career. Disappointments mainly come from failure in these areas, only. What it doesn't tell you is that failure in little everyday nitty gritties can add up to one big shitty emotional mess. That the big things can be pretty okay (and this is not saying they are going alright) but things still don't feel right.

So many things going on, it just makes me go, "Whoah, life". I am trying gratitude here, but everything pretty much going all wrong in all possible ways just makes me unable to. Sometimes, all I ask for is a little respite. I wish, You give me the small things.