Screw flowers, write meee songs :)

I don't want to paste song lyrics until I have written a swoony fan girl post about Gabe Bondoc, complete with a photo montage and accompanying videos. But I can't help it. I can't wait for that post. So yeah, this is me preempting myself with the Gabe Bondoc swoony fan girl post, and going right ahead with lyrics of his song.

Enter Gabe Bondoc, the YouTube star. This boy is my favorite boy today :) He is the boy in my head personified. He's scruffy in the right funky way. He has a funny/cool looking 5 o'clock stubble that will prolly sweep me off my feet even he didn't write any songs :P I will save my swoon-y thoughts to go along with the photo montage. Haha.

One of the best ways to make me weak in the knees is good writing. Well-written love letters blow me away. The power of words over me is just inexplainable. Even with songs -- most especially with songs. Gabe's songs are all well-written, well- thought of, and heartfelt, listening to them makes you feel all warm and squishy inside. Mighty fine song writer and all-around good guy -- his songs just give him away.

Here's a snippet of Gabe's song "Whether or Not." This boy has an amazing way with words.

Whether or Not
Gabe Bondoc

In a complicated world
You bring simplicity
Cause when everybody's talking
You're just listening

I've dreamed a thousand dreams
And still nothing compares
To the feeling that you give me
While you're standing here
I don't care if it's fair

And I'll wait til forever is through
Whether or not you love me
I'll be loving you
I'll wait til forever is through
Whether or not you love me
I'll be loving you
I'll be loving you

***

I'd totally marry this boy :P

Epiphany huh?

Photocredit: PostSecret

I wish it comes soon. Or, do I ask if it is ever coming? I can see a quarter life and work woes post. The only sure thing for now is that I know for a fact I shall open a Tumblr in a few :P

Happy Anniversary!

Okay, so I am 17 days late.

You might be wondering who the greetings are for. Tadah! for um, me :P Belated greetings supposedly for October 1st. Three weeks ago marked my year one milestone in the gym :) Yay! Okay okay, so maybe results-wise I am not exactly your poster kid for a buff gym-going person. But this means more to me than just losing weight. (Ooh, but now I have a defined jaw line to brag about. Hahaha). Most of my reasons I'll save for my personal journal, some of them a little too emotionally naked to post on this one. Lemme say that again, happy anniversary!

What better way to celebrate than with a nice gift -- a really nice gift. I wish a could say new Nike trainers, unfortunately not :P But as far as me, this is bigger, better! I mark my first year with my qualifying to the Eastwood Tribe for the Muay Thai Wars for 209! Double yay!

Training number 1 was yesterday, and I'd have to say I feel good about this. Will be seeing more of the "tribesmen" in the next month. FInals on the 21st November. I'm totally psyched!

Moving Out of my "Un-happy" Place

It's been a tough run for the past few weeks for me. I wasn't on top of my game, mostly because my head's spinning from the number of things I have to attend to. I'm overwhelmed, and being the organization freak that I am, I can't start working until everything is in place. In a lab experiment, yes that's the ideal. But in the work place, never happens. I am still trying to wrap my head around this interesting fact of the working life in the hopes of trying to afloat. And hopefully, to eventually be the boss of the tasks and not a whining slave to it. No, I take back my "eventually". I need it soon.

Suffice it to say, it's been pretty gruelling for me to be in this place. You want to do things, but you can't quite pin down how to do it most effeciently and of course effectively. I've been a mess at work, some days I feel like my brain's just mush. I would say even today still. Getting by, getting by.

My salvation apparently was just a little clearing of the head.

What I tout to be, my cleansing experience

Thank heavens I had to be rolling around Laguna yesterday. I needed this. Like I said to my Mum, this was a cleansing experience. I was dead tired from all the driving. Put together all the kilometers I covered yesterday can bring to Baguio. Seriously. But it's all good.

I won't trade that clarity, even if it may be short lived, even if it comes with soreness. There's something about driving away, on your own, that clears you up inside. Even if it's for work. It's as if somebody was blowing away all the bad vibes, all the pent up anger. It was good to be away outside for a full day.

As if that wasn't good enough, I um, found the location where YCML shot the last scene! Forgive the pop culture fiend in me, but this really made my day :P

Happy to say that I may be slowly moving out of my dark cloud :)

Wouldn't it be cool?

Without any intention of being sacrilegious nor blasphemous...

I really seriously wish my God would be someone I can sit with, tell stuff to, no judgment, no pretentions. I earnestly wish with all my heart we can do this sometime, God. Genuine no judgment must be awesome.

Photocredit: PostSecret

This Weekend: I Like :)

This week was a pretty stressful week. In terms of tasks and brain activity, this week would be on top of the imaginary ranking of work weeks. It doesn't exactly help that there was no gratification of any sort gotten from this week's client calls. I just wasn't working it. So since very early this week, my head was already in the weekends. I just wanted to sleep it all off, snuggle in bed, maybe watch FRIENDS, and try to shut off work for a while.

But hey, somehow things managed to put themselves together and I have all these things to go to :) Gad, I just wanted to see other people and talk about myself (heehee) and share a good laugh. So, yay for PV making it a hobby to fly to Manila on regular basis.

Dinner at Pasto, Fort

Friday with PV and Friends

This dinner almost didn't push through. PV was um, out of reach. P was waiting by 6750 for for Rach to hitch to Fort. Rach was apparently waiting for PV, makiki-hitch din daw sya to Fort. Which brings us back to PV, who was nowhere to be found. And me? I was sitting by the car inside Eastwood parking, eating leftover cookies, waiting for someone to go to Fort so I don't have to wait alone -- which defeats my purpose cos well, I am sitting by the parking lot waiting by myself. PV almost cancelled cos he was already super sleepy, P almost headed to Timog to meet other friends, Rach I think almost fell asleep sa house, and I almost headed home. So long story short, PV resurfaced back to the telecom world, I left Eastwood, and everyone started moving. We all got to Fort at 11-ish, by which time we were all sleepy.

Thank God we were all attention hogs. By the time we were all seated, everyone wanted all the airtime to themselves! It got all chaotic in the table and well, all the drowsiness went away. At least for a while. Sorry to the other patrons who found us too rowdy and/or noisy :P We had a little too much life and/or work life and/or career issues to keep it all calm and cool and collected. Sorreee.


Saturday+work

Then Saturday. Ran errands because I'm gunning for employee of the year :P Went to meet Carlo to get the cookies which were unbelievably good! Not a fan of crispy cookies, now Imma convert. He gave us thin and crispy cookies that were chewy. Sarappp! then headed home after. Ate a quick lunch and tried to sleep of a headache. Went to bed at 3PM. Dude, woke up at 6AM the next day! That's what I call restful slumber :)


UAAP Cheerdance Sunday!

Then Sunday. Woke up to a text from Mahal quoting me an insane price for patron tickets for the UAAP cheerdance compet. Some texts, some calls, and then I am taking a bath rushing to go to Mahal's. Good call :)

Warming up!

Front and center, baby!

Amazing crowd, as always :)

Thank you, for finding us tickets! You'da best :)

I said I was looking for a high. This may have been the adrenaline rush I was looking for, maybe. UP may have lost, but yeah I guess it's still all good. It's just that times like non-victory err, loss make you think. UP Pep may have lost but you still get envious of that something that they have for what they do. They cried over winning third place only because they found something they'd give their all to. Hay. Maybe I should write a separate entry for this.

But yeah, the almost-foiled dinner and the UP third place thingum notwithstanding, this weekend was outstanding :)

So 09-09-09 huh?

There's something about this day that was supposed to be lucky, the same way 08-08-08 last year was supposedly super lucky according to number enthusiasts. Not that I believe it or anything, but I just didn't expect too much hassle on this supposedly "lucky" day. Ahente tells her story.

So yesterday was errand Wednesday. Not entirely a smart idea to be shuttling from the South to the North in the same day, but yeah um, just did. Crazy route schedule follows. Step 1, take SLEX, then service road to Taguig. All this while afternoon classes for grade school and high school kids have been happily cancelled. Now that I think about it, I don't think it was exactly a smart idea to be running around the Metro while bagyong Maring was in raging fury. For the young and naive, it was just a "fun and really cold day" but I would think real grownups would call it um, un-smart *cough stupid. Step 2, go straight to the north via EDSA and visit the boundary of Maynila and QC. Ooh, step 1.5, exercise your heart by causing it to palpitate while watching your fuel gauge go blink blink while you traverse the seemingly endless C5 and fret about how you can gas up when there is no cash in your wallet and there is no way you're braving the ATM in rains pouring heavily like that. But yeah, kid finds ways, so woot woot :)

I should just say, no lunch break for hardworking kid! And this is where all the action begins. From QC, I go to Cainta, stopping by a nearby Mcdo to grab a caramel sundae, justifiably so because I didn't have lunch -- at least no sit down lunch, but I had medium fries, i just like playing up hunger :P So kid gets all excited diggin into the delicious caramel sundae, puts it down on the cup holder and goes on driving. One more look at the cup and ooh, there still are caramel smudges on the sides of the cup, prolly wouldn't hurt to scrape it all clean. Kid takes too long looking at the bottom of the cup, forgets driving for a wee bit and oh, itsa Lancer in front, and whaaat, I almost rear-ended it. Thank you dear Lord I missed it even just by a hairline. Odd thing was, what I worried about more that paying for the damaged front and back bumpers. I got really eep-ed out thinking about my answer for when my boss asks me why I hit the poor little Lancer's rear bumper -- Um, sorry boss I was scraping the last of my caramel sundae so I got distracted. Diba?

One's never enough, so let's get to the two other hassle stories of 09-09-09. Heaved sigh of relief for the non-occurence of the rear-ender, grateful the front bumper's all good. Oh wait, what I scraped the hub caps? Oh yes, I did. I was waiting for the security guards at this company to issue my ID pass, so I tried parking the car. Damn, cement stepsss. Now the front right caps come with tiger stripes and they're not pretty.

Third and last, my Shang parking trifle. Am not a Shang regular so I got a little confused with the elevated parking. Kid gets in, finds her way to slot, goes inside the mall buys things on her list, and then goes back to the car. Now the tricky part is getting out. I was looking around intently like an idiot trying to find my way out when I didn't notice that I drove past the ticket booth. The carpark guard had to flag me and tell me I forgot to pay. Oyeh, imagine my embarrassment. it would've been funny with friends, but when you're all alone, it's just um, stupid and un-funny.

That's the 09-09-09 story.

Sexist, Ageist, Fattist, Pretty-ist Saturday

So yesterday was the Muay Thai Marathon. I was puyat the night before and I feel the week's stress taking it's toll. Plus, the GX room aircon was busted. I don't know if one of those things, or a mix of all those things, but I was just not in my combat mojo yesterday. I was slow and tired and literally dragging my arms and legs to follow the tracks. I could've just gone out of the room, stayed in the lounge to read the papers or gotten baked in the sauna -- but I stayed. I hate that feeling when I bail on a class and then figured our later that I could've gotten my second wind. Long marathon story short, I amazingly finished my 2 hours. Albeit a little too sloppy and ungraceful, but technically I still made it in one piece to the end of the class.

My sexist, ageist, fattist story goes like this. Marathons are usually team classes. You have a few instructors taking turns, leading a few tracks at a time. The last chunk of the marathon, a new girl went on stage. I have been doing marathon for quite a while so I knew a pretty good number of instructors. I know the ones who teach the Eastwood classes and some of the ones who guest-teach. But this new one, I've never really seen. It was kinda weird there was no warm feelings of welcoming from me for this girl in the pink spandex. I'll tell you why. Maybe you'll feel the same after my word picture.

Pink Spandex Girl (PSG) is a middle aged woman, probably in her late 30's and um, not in perfect combat form. Now, you're probably asking, what is THE perfect combat form? I would say toned thighs, prominent jawbone, firm arms, and unbelievably flat tummy. Now I know that sounds unfair. But lets go on with the word picture. PSG has muscular thighs, but in a muscular-thighs-that-look-too-chunky-for-a-woman kind of way. It's muscular but it has that jiggly thing going when she does knee raises. Arms not too firm, and much like the muscular thighs have a pretty attention-getting jiggle to them. I am completely aware that this has MEAN written all over it. This is where my v brillian (according to me) title comes in. The fitness world is a cruel place to be, most especially for those who are supposed to be the fitness gurus i.e. the group exercise instructors. The group classes are sexist, ageist, pretty-ist, and fattist.

What is an ideal group exercise class instructor? This will sound unfair and to a point ridiculous, but for some odd reason, this is the unwritten rule to this profession. The ideal group exercise instructor is male, young, unbelievably toned, and good looking.

You see the truth to this rule when you observe which classes are the most packed. Check the instructor heading the class and he most probably fits the bill, this bill. The good looking bit is pretty relative since this is all a matter of taste, but the male and the young and the unbelievably toned -- all non-negotiables.

So PSG is still right in front on the stage, doing her thing. And I must say, she is pretty good at what she does. She knows the tracks pretty well, she is brimming with energy, and she knows how to hype the class. But yeah, the group still has this non-warm, to some point pretty smug welcome, if that's at all a welcome, for her as she leads the class. You ask why? At least as far as I'm concerned, its because she's -- one a girl, two older than than 25 (or at least she looks like she is, err sorry i'f you're only 23! Heehee), three has those jiggly things, and four well um, beauty isn't her best. So you see right there, I am a girl (trying to rationalize the non-warm welcome for her) but I feel this way about her too. That's in your face sexist, ageist, pretty-ist, and right smack fattist.

I think about why I write about this. I'd like to think not to correct, much as I'd like to I also know how it's gonna be futile. And much as that is a lame reason, it also is a bitter truth. I also think neither to condone. I'm guessing as an acknowledgment of things that happen. Yeah, it can get pretty cruel.

You think PSG knows this?

Risque and Restless. And well, Sorry.

Risque is good. At least for me, it gives me this sense of bold and young, and well, I know P will laugh as I say this, but yeah, risque makes me feel cool. Yeah yeah, put down the L's on your forehead. Sometimes I feel like I've been staying on the safe side a little too long, it gets a bit boring. A taste of the dangerous, if I may use some more cliches uh, makes me feel alive. Ugh, came out wrong. But yeah, I think you get it.

Out with my attempt at a decent introduction and on to my story story. As with my other attempts at being risque, this latest one, actually ones, to say the least didn't uh, make me feel alive. It's definitely adrenaline rush -- but not the fun kind.

Saturday night was dinner night with the B's cos PV flew to Manila for a quick quick weekend. (I think I have to write a separate happy entry with all the photos, because that Saturday was a happy Saturday. But yeah, I get into these stupid things, so I have to write this remorse entry first. Happy entry in a bit). We had a quick bite at Rockwell to meet Rach, and then planned to go to Ewud for a supposed party. So convoy from Rockwell to Ewud, we took McKinley. We were driving at around 1AM very early Sunday morning. This very brilliant kid made a very bright decision and for some really stupid reason, are you ready for this? Drum roll please! Got caught for --- beating the red light. Take this, that big intersection in McKinley when you come from the Polo Club and Forbes (sashaaal! Hahaha!). And wow, of all places to be a disobedient driver, kid decided to do it -- at The Fort. Talk about bright bright smart decisions. Really smarttt.

So yeah, just when I thought I got away with the stupid thing, I look into my rear view and there was this dude with the familiar red and blue lights flashing from his bike. Oh, it's the Taguig police. AND he's after me. Because stupid was rad that early Sunday morning, I just kept going, thinking maybe if I just keep driving, Mr. Officer will go away. And then I quickly (thank God) realized that I wasn't in some Charlie's Angels flick. So, I slowed down and pulled over. And then convenient realization, I am driving with a proud Professional license in my purse, so yeah it's gonna be EXPENSIVE. Yes, all caps because it's that expensive. I knew there was no getting away from this so I knew I had to apologized to the officer. It was such a relief that I was just given a warning. Took my OR/CR and scribbled police notes on my paper. You can just imagine my sigh of relief. I must've said like twenty thousand thank yous. Nothing like getting pulled over to shake you off from your proud driver stance.

Or so I thought.

With the ink on my my license OR?CR still pretty fresh from Sunday morning, look what surprise was awaiting me by E. Rod Jr. on a bright sunny Monday morning. So much for lessons and other fluffy shit like that, stupid kid strikes again. Left the office 10-ish to go to an 11AM meeting somewhere in Crame. I was south-bound along E. Rod., making a right to Green Meadows. Oh, lemme surprise you. Second lane from the right and I take a sharp right, proudly overtaking the PUV. The surprise is on me, as I make my way to my right turn, an officer in blue flags me down. Deja vu much? All I could muster was a long and quiet "shiyeeeet" under my breath.

Sunday was Schmuck Beats the Red Light day. Monday was Stupid Still Hasn't Learned Her Lesson day. Swerving. By this second time I pretty much know the drill. Roll down your window, show your license, and well, show them how stupid you are by brandishing the part that says Professional on your card. I was being charged Php 700 for my stupid swerving mistake. I was told I have to get my license from Makati. Double Shit. I just felt really stupid being flagged twice in consecutive days. That was a really ugly feeling.

The officer mentioned Php 700 and a 3-day driver reeducation seminar, if I heard him right. I knew the exasperation was showing on my face. My Monday police officer was hinting at a bribe. He was like, "kung masyadong mahirap para sayo, dito nalang tayo. Ikaw na lang bahala sa kin". Damn, that was a really delicious offer. I'll shell out more than the Php 700, BUT I wouldn't have to be "reeducated", and I don't have to file a leave/ absence without pay and head out to Makati. Sounded pretty fair. Err, or pretty sneaky. Gets you off the hook, just like that.

But yeah, the feeling was ugly with my run ins with the law and I just knew doing something like this wouldn't make the feeling go away. I knew it wouldn't sit well with me. So I mumbled something about following the law and being okay with the hassle cos I got myself into this. I think those were the magic words. My officer just said, "okay na, sige na. Baka naman sabihin mo masyado akong mahigpit" and then he let me go, just like that. You don't know how much relief washed over me after that.

Thank heavens for giving me my chance back. I shall not be reckless on the streets. No more proud driver. I am sorry. And to the two officers who almost apprehended me, thank you for being nice and reasonable. I shall be a very obedient driver from now on. Even when you guys aren't looking.

What if?

Photo Credit: PostSecret